The most fundamental characteristic of a turntable is how it looks like a table. It’s right there in the name. And would you look at that, there's a stone that kinda looks like one of those folding tables you have to pull the legs out and then secure the little diagonal supports in place with those sliding cylinders. Where does everyone even get those tables? They always look identical. Anyways, just like that, you find a stone and confidently walk it down to the camp and start your set. The set is, of course, silent, but done with such confidence and sense of purpose that those vibes spread from you into the audience. You push sliders that aren't there, blow dust off the records no one quite sees, and carefully beatmatch songs no one can hear. Everyone is enraptured who watches your "DJ set,” and while it wasn't the loudest of the parties out there , everyone agrees they saw something unique this night.